NaNoWriMo – In The Past

I was looking through an old blog of mine (MSNspace or something…) and lo and behold, I have a log of the last time I completed NaNo. It was 2007, so I’m due another shot at it. For the amusement of all and sundry, here is the way ‘Backlog’ grew:

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Writer’s Block

Writer’s block hurts. It really really hurts. There’s no real way to explain to a non-writer the sheer devastation of staring at the page, writing a sentence and then crossing it out. Writing another – crossing it out. Staring some more…

There’s a terrible sense of loss. One moment you had a world right there at your fingertips. Then there’s nothing. Your characters refuse your cajoling, the paragraphs won’t gell, and sentences tnagle up like twisted string. Each word is an enemy, each comma a challenge to place.

I’ve been struggling with writer’s block on my current WIP for coming close to two years now. At first this was because I wrote myself into a corner by not outlining (I’m an outliner – to those of you who don’t outline, my heartfelt admiration). But then – even when the story was ironed out – things didn’t happen smoothly. True, I got about eight chapters written when I moved towns and had a short holiday from work. But since then I have written perhaps a couple of thousand words at most. Each time I try, I feel rebuffed, confused, convinced that it’s no longer good – I’ve lost any talent I ever had – I’m no use – and the story is plunging into disrepair. Look at that sentence, I think. There are so many really good sentences earlier on. This just isn’t good enough.

The pressure mounts, I clam up, and poof goes another writing session. To get the creativity out, I writer RP, scribbles, outlines, ideas… all kinds of things. I write pages and pages happily. But when it comes to my novel I freeze up. What is even more frustrating is that this didn’t happen with any of my previous books. Do I aim too high? Am I essentially driving myself into a state of perpetual tension and killing my creativity? More importantly, how do I stop?

*sigh*

Sarah the Pixie

She won’t actually be called Sarah, you know. But she was inspired by a Sarah of my acquaintance. Wearing a cap on exactly the right angle, she turned to me and gave me a look that was sheer delightful mischief, and one word popped into my brain: ‘PIXIE’. (She’s delighted)

Suddenly I have a gorgeously talkative, effervescent dancer lounged across a table in the corner of my mind. She is aparently from the court of Queen Mab, sent to keep the peace as a nuetral party on the bequest of all sovreigns involved. Why anyone would send her to keep the peace, I don’t know! All I know is that sometime after the murder of my unfortunate male expendible cheating gentry, a new dancer shows up at the club Iris works in. She’s bold, cheerful, magical… laughter incarnate.A short petite sparrow with bright red hair and the widest smile, Sarah has the whole clientelle eating out of her palm. Maybe it’s due to her bizarre sideways honesty that Iris never guesses her true nature.

All I know about her really is that she’s there to keep the peace during the investigations, and God help any who decide to try to cross her. Five foot three she may be, but that’s five foot three too tall for you!